There is no vaccination that can protect you from tough times. We are not, nor will we ever be, immune to stress. We may have different triggers that set us off, different topics that test us, but trouble trails us from the day of our birth until our last day on earth. Our series for the next several weeks will challenge us to evaluate how we cope with trouble, how we handle hardship, where we are inclined to turn to help us deal with it. Where do we go when feel compelled to escape? Where do we turn when we are tired and need rest?
There are many healthy ways to cope or escape. Socializing with friends. Working out at the gym. Volunteering in the community. But the past 18 months have contributed to the problem by limiting the number of healthy ways we have countered rising stress levels. Socializing with friends to take our minds off the headlines has been limited. Closed gyms have limited physical activity to release stress naturally. In the process of not having our normal outlets to beat stress and decompress, many have turned to alternatives to cope.
But, rather than finding a healthy alternative by which to cope, some are much worse off now than they were before. That’s because unhealthy escape is a double whammy – not only does it NOT deal with or address the underlying problem; it actually ends up adding another problem to the mix. Imagine if you saw a drowning person struggling to keep their head above the water. If you could, you’d throw them a life preserver to cling to and rescue them. But turning to an unhealthy escape is like tossing a drowning person a rope with a cement block tied to it. Not only will it do nothing to help them; it will actually do more harm than good. It made a bad situation much worse! So it is when we turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms for escape or for rest that can truly only be found in one place: Jesus.
Let’s talk for a moment about how not to approach this series. Let me discourage you from ignoring it because you don’t think any of it will apply to you. Being too quick to jump to that conclusion may itself be a warning sign that a particular coping mechanism is a blindspot for you that you don’t even see. Also, this series is not being offered to puff up your pride because you may not have a particular weakness that someone else does. Nor is this series intended to equip you to become better at judging others, whether inside or outside the church. Instead, listen for two. Listen for yourself, being open to the possibility that you may have some unhealthy escapes in your life right now that need attention. But also listen for others who definitely do. Listen so that you better understand the struggles others are facing, and so that you are better equipped not to judge, but to jump in and help however you can.
To serve as a bit of a self-assessment throughout this series, here are four questions we’ll keep revisiting to guide us in possibly exposing some areas of concern we might want to address.
#1 – Can I go without it? This is a better question to ask than just asking yourself if your use of something is excessive. This is because quantity and amounts are subjective and every one of us is proficient at justifying just about any amount for any reason. But the real question should be can I do without it? Can I go without?
#2 – Is this a topic I can comfortably discuss with a fellow Christian? Am I able to share my struggle? If not, what does that say about the gravity of the situation? If it is something I am comfortable discussing, that may be the best evidence that this isn’t a problem area, or if it is, that you’re already in the process of seeking additional help to work through it. But if you can’t comfortably discuss it with a fellow Christian, why not? Is your inability to do so an indicator that you’re hiding a problem?
#3 – Am I avoiding a long-term solution in favor of short-term satisfaction? Would you stick with the same mechanic if you had to keep taking your car back to him after every time he worked on your car? If he was doing a good job of fixing the problem, you wouldn’t need to keep going back to him, right? So if whatever you turn to for escape is actually helping you overcome a problem, should you need to return to it more frequently or less? If I keep returning to it because the same problem persists, how effective is it in the long term? Have you become so attached to its short-term satisfaction that it has led you to stop caring about a long-term solution?
#4 – Am I looking to creation for something that can only be provided by the Creator? It might be a person. It might be a substance. It might be a place or an experience. Whatever it is, if I am placing on it the responsibility or the expectation of freeing me from my burdens and providing me with lasting fulfillment and satisfaction, I will be disappointed. The sooner we understand that about anything – about everything – the sooner we’re ready to look to Jesus for what only he can provide: real rest. We’ll revisit these four questions again this morning as we consider our first escape: chemical dependency.
To anyone who has ever had too much to drink, whether intentionally or not, the imagery provided in the verses from Proverbs this morning is rather obvious. The author is clearly describing what it’s like to be intoxicated, to be drunk. Does it surprise you to find such an accurate description in the Bible – to find such vivid imagery of a sin? It kind of catches one off guard, doesn’t it? We’re typically a little more comfortable simply naming the sin and forbidding it than we are going into detail about what it’s like. It’s one thing to read through an account in the Bible in which a sin takes place, and another to poetically paint the sin in such detail!
Moreover, the path by which we arrived at this candid description was itself a bit of an unexpected turn, wasn’t it? We’re drawn in by the first several questions and are quick to mentally shoot our hands up in the air: “I have woe. I have sorrow. I have strife. I have complaints.” We are sucked in by the completely relatable issues being raised, so that wherever the author is going, we’re listening.
Then the road begins to turn slightly: “Who has needless bruises? Who has bloodshot eyes?” (v.29b). “OK, I guess… are we talking about someone being beaten up now? Not getting enough sleep because of the degree of suffering? I’m still paying attention, but now I’m a little confused. Go on.”
“Those who linger over wine, who go to sample bowls of mixed wine” (v.30). And now we get it. The point being drawn out is that abusing alcohol brings about all of those things for which I had my hand up. It is the source of those woes, sorrows, strifes, complaints, and yes, the needless bruises and bloodshot eyes. The irony, of course, is that what wouldn’t shock us would be for someone experiencing woes, sorrows, strifes, or complaints to turn to a drink or two… or three or more as an escape. But the proverb isn’t condoning cocktails as a means of coping, but instead concludes that they are the cause of woe, sorrow, strife, or complaints. In other words, turning to alcohol as an escape from problems will itself only foment problems. What we turn to as a solution only compounds the problem.
We could at this point highlight all the destructive consequences that can result from chemical dependence, whether by drink or by drug. You already know how lives can so easily be ruined by such things. We could point to all those bad things and wrap up this message – and each successive message in this series – with a similar theme of “See – don’t do these bad things because they’ll mess up your life.” For some that would be enough.
But God is never as interested in your actions as he is in your attitude. And that’s the underlying issue. When we talk about chemical dependency and turning to drugs or drinking for escape, for rest, the heart is the real issue. So rather than wasting your time with that little back and forth dialogue in your head that goes something like this: “I don’t have a problem. I just like to relax once in a while with a drink or two. Just a little something to take the edge off of a stressful day. Just a little me time. I’m no alcoholic,” let’s evaluate our relationship with drinking or prescription/recreational/illegal drugs as a heart issue.
Let’s steer clear of extremes, pretending that the solution is found in simply prohibiting such things because of the damage they could cause. They aren’t inherently sinful (unless we’re talking about taking illegal substances, or if we’re underage, or if we’re disobeying parental rules) and can be enjoyed in moderation. So rather than resorting to the easy method of making everything black and white and pretending more rules will accomplish what only the gospel already has, let’s evaluate the relationship we have with such substances. After all, a person can still have an unhealthy relationship with certain substances without being an addict or alcoholic. How do we determine that? We look at our hearts.
Since I can’t see your heart and you can’t see mine, we have to personally wrestle with the questions I raised earlier to help provide us with an honest assessment of where we’re at.#1 – Ask if you can go without it. #2 – Is this a topic I can comfortably discuss with a fellow Christian? #3 – Am I avoiding a long-term solution in favor of short-term satisfaction? #4 – Am I looking to creation for something that can only be provided by the Creator?
Now all these questions can do is make real for us the possibility of a problem. What they don’t do, however, is address the solution. We often presume that a sterner preaching of the law is the solution to solving chemical dependency. It’s not. A better understanding of the gospel is. I’m free. I have in Christ what no chemical can cure or solve. Chemicals may temporarily numb my pain, but Jesus nullified my sin. I have a Savior who promised a permanent long-term solution that also offers short-term satisfaction.
“Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires” (Galatians 5:24). Paul didn’t say, “Hey Christian, you need to or should crucify your flesh,” but that your flesh has already been crucified by virtue of Jesus’ crucifixion. Just as surely as he was nailed to the cross, so were your sins, and your sinful passions and desires along with them. There’s nothing for you to do other than to realize who you already are in Christ. And that isn’t an addict. It isn’t an alcoholic. It is a forgiven child of God.
That current status is not something you have to achieve. Your flesh has already been crucified with Christ, which means you have real power to put off that old passion and desire. If it’s been nailed to the cross, then it doesn’t own you or control you. You are free to say no, free to embrace your forgiveness, free to stop falling for the lies of chemical escape that always elude you. You have in Jesus real rest, real escape from real problems. And more of Christ, not chemicals, will fill you with real rest. So heed Paul’s advice to the Ephesians: “Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit” (Ephesians. 5:18). There is no vaccination that can protect you from tough times. But there is salvation that can provide rest from them. Real rest. Escape that is eternal. Literally!