As we continue our series, Rethinking Religion, in this post we give our attention to a topic that can be a deal breaker for people when it comes to Christianity. I’m not talking about how smug Christians can sometimes come across when our concern about being right overshadows our call to be loving. Neither am I referring to the perception that some of our beliefs are downright absurd.
No, what I’m referring to is the observation that in a number of ways, the believer’s life doesn’t really seem to be any different or better off than the non-believer’s. Therefore, if the casual observer notes no discernible difference, no greater appeal or attraction to the Christian and his way of life, then why bother? What’s the big deal?
Moreover, to many, the whole category of Christianity’s perceived requirements – the “have to’s” and the “musts,” arguably make it quite unappealing. Christians must live according to a strict set of rules. They have to go to church. Christians are supposed to give offerings. They are required to read their Bibles. You could add plenty more to the list, I’m sure.
While it isn’t the purpose of this post to address each and every one of these perceived requirements that may not make Christianity all that appealing, for the sake of brevity, I will simply respond that a Christian doesn’t have to do any of the those things mentioned, or anything else, for that matter. There are no requirements in the life of a Christian; he is free to live however he pleases.
But here’s the thing: a Christian wants to do these things. God’s grace and love have changed his heart, bringing it into alignment with God’s plan for how to live. Not perfectly, mind you – but changed hearts nevertheless now see as opportunities what used to be viewed as requirements.
There’s another observation some have of Christianity that doesn’t appear to be noteworthy or especially attractive. It doesn’t seem like the Christian has any special dispensation from God regarding suffering or hardship. So if a believer and a non-believer both have to struggle with traumas and tragedies like cancer and unemployment and divorce and sexual abuse and chronic pain and miscarriages and the list goes on, then why bother? If God is in the Christian corner, shouldn’t he guard and protect believers from such things? If he’s capable of doing so, which Christians claim to believe he is, then why doesn’t he do more to shield them from such things?
It’s this last question surrounding the matter of hardships that we’re giving our attention to in this post. Each of those hardships listed – and so many more – could be considered what we call a “cross.”
Although it often uses the term in a lighthearted manner, the secular world is familiar with that term, “cross.” She says, “This is my cross to bear,” referring to her love of chocolate and the need to show restraint whenever surrounded by copious amounts of chocolate that are available to her. He refers to his “cross” when being stuck living in Southern California with its beaches, sun, and near-perfect weather.
However, when Christians use the term, there really isn’t anything lighthearted about it. The way Jesus used in in Mark 8 reflects this. Jesus said, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me” (v.34).
The cross Jesus refers to in the life of a believer is a burden that tests or tries one’s faith. That burden is unique in the life of the Christian because of her faith in God. So even if a believer and a non-believer experience the exact same hardship, it affects the Christian differently. It is a cross.
For example, everyone would agree that cancer is awful all around, no matter who is experiencing it. But cancer doesn’t cause a non-believer to question or doubt God’s love in the face of suffering, because God isn’t a part of the equation for them. And while no one likes to struggle financially, such struggles don’t cause a non-believer to second-guess if God is really able to provide as he promised, because God isn’t a factor. So what makes a thing a unique cross for a Christian is the impact it has on one’s faith.
To help us properly understand the role of these crosses for the Christian, let me ask you a reflection question. Has anything of great worth to you or anything you truly value ever come without difficulty? Was anything that was really worth it easy for you? Now you might be able to fire off a short list of a few things that could qualify, but generally speaking, for a thing to be truly appreciated and valued, it probably involved hard work and adversity to get it. In fact, that hard work and sacrifice that was required are often why we value it.
Consider the gift of children. Even conceiving itself can be a hardship for many couples, let alone delivering a baby. When it comes to delivering a baby, I don’t know too many moms who would say that it was a piece of cake. The things we appreciate require hard work.
Like getting a college degree. Or getting – and staying – in shape. A great marriage isn’t easy. The list goes on, and we could share stories about the hard work and the struggle we’ve put in to get to enjoy many of the things in life we’d say are worth it.
So then, should it surprise us that following Jesus would be any different? Why should it shock us that he makes such a big ask of us to bear crosses – hardships – for a greater faith and deeper relationship with him? If virtually everything in life that we value or appreciate requires a great deal of sacrifice and struggle, surely we ought to expect the same when it comes to our greatest treasure, Jesus.
But we are surrounded by countless people who prefer the easier path of playing the victim and spending their lives complaining rather than putting in the hard work to achieve or acquire things they value or appreciate.
Sadly, Christians can be numbered among them. The result is that many of the things that should be crosses to bear for Christians are not, because of their refusal to pick those crosses up. There’s no cross when it comes to Sunday morning, because sleeping in and sports win over worship. There’s no cross to bear when it comes to lending my neighbor a hand, because I “don’t have the time” (or more accurately, refuse to make the time). There’s no cross to bear facing any ridicule or ribbing for being a Christian because nobody at work or the gym even knows I’m a Christian to begin with.
The Christian life is pretty easy when we don’t bother with those crosses Jesus called us to pick up… until we come to find out that neglecting those crosses brings with it its own set of struggles later on. Have you ever counted the cost of avoiding hard work or effort life in general? It often ends up costing more in the end, doesn’t it?
So it is with our crosses. When we avoid them, it often ends up costing us more in the end. Like maybe my marriage. Or my job. Or a friendship. Or my self-control that results in an addiction. So avoiding the hard crosses potentially leaves us much worse off than if we had picked them up and done the hard work in the first place. But just as hard things are worth it, so are crosses.
In fact, the more we pick up the crosses Jesus allows in our lives, the more we see them for what they really are – not burdens, but blessings. But in order for us to see the blessings of our own crosses, we must first look to the greatest blessing that would ever come from a cross – the cross of Christ.
Jesus’ cross is hands down the greatest blessing. There alone do we find relief from the burden of our sin. For every cross we neglect, avoid, or ignore, Jesus’ cross forgives. For every time we blazed a path of our own making instead of following in his footsteps, Jesus’ cross forgives. For every time we pridefully presumed to know better than him, Jesus’ cross forgives. For every time chose wrong over right, Jesus’ cross forgives. And at Jesus’ cross we find not only forgiveness, but also freedom – freedom from guilt, from shame, from regret, from fear, and ultimately freedom from self.
Here’s how it works. The forgiveness that flows to me from Jesus’ cross leads me to look differently at my own crosses to bear. That’s because, to pick up a cross and bear it, carry it, I have to let go of something else. What, exactly? Self.
Jesus told the crowd, along with his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me” (v.34). Deny self. In our society today, you will not find a more radical ideology than that! To a culture that has cemented its celebration of self in how we identify – gender, sexual or political orientation, skin color, and an endless list of other labels, Jesus demands that we let go of it. Deny it. To a culture that says the real problem is everyone else failing to embrace me for who I am, Jesus says, “Wrong – who you are is the problem. Self is the problem.
You want something that is real, something that matters, not just for this short life, but for eternity? Then listen up.” “For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?” (v.35-37). Insist on self and risk losing everything. Let go of self and gain everything in following Jesus.
Then, when we aren’t so enamored with individualism and consumed with self, we can see what matters most. “He then began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and after three days rise again. He spoke plainly about this…” (v.31-32). THIS is what it looks like to deny self and be free to serve others. Jesus, God-in-the-flesh Jesus, denied himself and suffered and died, not for self, but for you. For me. For everyone else. For the greater good. For eternity. For suffering to be temporary and for salvation to be forever. For limiting the number of occupants in hell. And for freeing us to put each other first. That’s what the gospel does.
Who benefits when we are free of serving self? My neighbor. You may disagree with me, but that care for my neighbor, care for the greater good of the group over self, seems to me to be what is sorely lacking in our culture today.
One of the things I find so appealing about World War II history is the selflessness of that generation. I’m aware that movies and books covering that period may occasionally go over the top in glorifying the spirit of those times and the heroes who served them. Nevertheless, there was a very real awareness of the need to come together to serve the greater good of society over the individual, and if that hadn’t happened, the outcome could have been disastrous.
I don’t know that it could be done today. Oh I don’t doubt there would be many armchair quarterbacks sharing their opinions of what should be done. I don’t doubt there would be many activists somehow imagining that their boycott or opposition or stand for this or that might be making a grand difference. But I do doubt that our self-absorbed, self-serving society would be able to come together for the greater good if it means sacrificing our individualism.
But Jesus can change that, because the cross he died on not only forgives us, but frees us from self and empowers and equips us to pick up our own crosses. When we pick up those crosses, others are blessed. We are blessed. And God is at his best through us.