In what area of your life could patience make the greatest impact? Would your relationships be better off if you were able to slow down and not rush them along so fast? Would you lose your temper less? Would patience enable you to be a better listener? Would it help you make better decisions if you patiently thought things through a little longer? Most of us would see some sort of benefit in some way if patience was a little more prevalent in our lives.
As we consider this habit of his grace – patience – though, would you really find it all that valuable if I spent the rest of this post focusing on tips and tricks to help you become more patient in your life? Would “5 Steps toward More Patience” or “3 Things you Can Do Right Now to Practice Patience” radically impact your ability to be more patient? I don’t think so. The truth is, to help us become more patient we don’t need more information, but rather transformation. Real patience requires real change. And the good news is that Jesus is in the business of changing people. Jesus can transform us because Jesus alone can provide the patience we’re pursuing.
Let’s start with where I think we most often tend to go wrong. When the matter of patience comes up, the way we frame the discussion around it is that we need more of it. We tell others they need to be MORE patient. As we reflect on an incident when we lost our cool, we tell ourselves we should have been MORE patient. But consider this: what if MORE patience isn’t the solution to the problem? Have you ever found yourself pressed for time, knowing you needed to jump in the shower before rushing to the next thing, but you just didn’t have the time? So what is the quick fix? Throw on an extra swipe or two of deodorant. Spray on a quick spritz of perfume or cologne. And it works… kind of… briefly… maybe. But not so well. You can try to cover it up, but inevitably the reminder that you didn’t actually shower has a way of coming back to haunt you later on at some point. In the same way, hoping that MORE patience will solve the problem is like a smelly teenager trying to cover up a bad case of B.O. with half a stick of deodorant – it doesn’t work!
Why doesn’t it work? Because it doesn’t address the real problem. Just as the stink needs to be scrubbed away in the shower rather than covered up, so something else is needed rather than just thinking MORE patience will solve the problem. Do you want to know what the real problem is? Do you want to know what question you should be asking yourself, rather than “Why am I not more patient?” Instead of “How can I become more patient,” here’s the real question you ought to be asking: “Why am I so impatient in the first place?” That’s an entirely different question, isn’t it? So if we want to see more of this habit of his grace in our lives, if we want patience to prevail, the solution isn’t seeking how to add more of it; the solution must address the root problem – our impatience.
“How do I become more patient” is really asking “Why am I so impatient?” My guess is that as you wrestle with that question more, you will likely uncover a lie or two that you have been believing. Why is it hard for you to be patient with other people in general, even those you’ve never met? Might it be that the lie replaying itself over and over in your head is the lie that all your problems are someone else’s fault? If you actually believe that lie, of course it will be difficult to be patient with anyone else if you view everyone else as the cause of all or most of your problems. Why do you lose it so quickly with your children? Is it because you believe the lie that they should somehow be perfect, perhaps even stemming from your own upbringing under the impression that perfection was what your parents demanded? Why do you have so little patience with your spouse? Is it because you believe the lie that your spouse should be more like you by now, and every time you are reminded that they aren’t, you perceive it to be a deficiency instead of just a difference? No, the solution to our problem is not to cover up the stink of our impatience by adding more patience; the solution begins with determining the source of my impatience. That may very well mean uncovering a lie that you’ve allowed yourself to believe for too long.
While it’s easier and far more tempting to blame others for testing our patience or causing our impatience, if others were actually the problem, we’d spend the rest of our lives trying to fix something we can’t fix. You’d perpetually be impatient, because you cannot possibly fix everyone else who “makes you” impatient. But you can fix you. You can fix your impatience, if you are first willing to acknowledge that you are the real issue and not someone else. But if I continue to deny that the real issue is me and my impatience, I’ll never really address the problem in a way that will bring about meaningful change, and I’ll miss out on the grace that is able to make a real difference.
Consider the parable Jesus told. What was the real issue? Was the fig tree not given the opportunity to produce figs? Was it not planted in good soil? Was not enough time allowed? No, the tree had been given every opportunity to produce fruit, but failed to do so. The tree was the problem, not anyone or anything else! It wasn’t producing fruit. So as we apply this parable to the fruit of patience, we must take ownership and realize that whatever fruit of patience we’re looking for in our own lives is our own responsibility and not anyone else’s. The scary part of the parable is that as much patience as the landowner exhibits, even extending the life of the tree for one more year, there still was the very real possibility that failing to bear fruit resulted in being cut down. That is really the sobering reality of each of these habits of his grace – to realize that a failure to produce them in our lives gives the landowner – God – every right to cut down the trees that don’t produce!
Jesus, the master storyteller, has a way of making things very personal, and when he gets personal, he leaves his listeners with nowhere else to look but in the mirror at ourselves. If you look at the discussion which led up to Jesus telling this parable, he took it from a general question to a personal point. Tragedy had struck when Pilate had murdered some of the Galileans and disgraced the Jewish faith by mixing the blood of those murdered in with the blood of the animals scarfed in the Temple. Just as they do today, people at that time presumed that it must have been karma – for those people to be on the receiving end of such tragedy, they surely must have done something wrong to have had it coming. But Jesus quickly shut down that line of reasoning and made the whole thing very personal when he concluded, “But unless you repent, you too will all perish” (Lk. 13:5).
What came next was the parable in these verses of our text. Rather than pondering the status of others who suffered in this way or that, Jesus said the real issue is where do you stand? What do your branches look like? Where is your fruit? And through the parable, Jesus wants us to take away two important points: 1 – God is very patient in looking for our fruit, and 2 – God’s patience with us has its limits.
Notice that God patiently extended the time for the fruit tree to bear fruit! Isn’t that just like God? And why is he so patient? Peter explained it: “[God] is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance” (2 Peter 3:9). God is patient because he wants to save everyone. One of the points that came up in our recent discussion of the book, Rooted, was the honest struggle of reading the Bible – especially the Old Testament, because there are parts that drag along and simply aren’t all that exciting. But you know what the Bible is? A record of God’s patience. His people turn away, and God patiently sends one prophet after another to turn them back to him. His leaders display one sinful character flaw after another, and God patiently corrects and uses them anyway. God’s people turn away; God waits for his people to return. God is patient, so the parable captures that habit of his grace by providing more time for the tree to bear fruit.
But notice this also: God appointed a limited time for the tree to bear fruit. It wasn’t open-ended. It wasn’t indefinite, until “some day.” It was one year in the parable. What does that one year represent for us? Right now! This very moment! For today might be day 364 of the one-year extension given to the tree to produce fruit. If so, then tomorrow is day 365 and the year is up. Time to cut down the trees that still aren’t bearing fruit!
God is patient – don’t worry! God’s patience is limited – don’t wait! Both are true, depending on which message you need to hear. If we think little of God and his Word right now, don’t wait! If we are concerned about not measuring up before God, don’t worry – Jesus is our patience!
John realized that. In the Book of Revelation he wrote, “I, John, your brother and companion in the suffering and kingdom and patient endurance that are ours in Jesus…” (Revelation 1:9). John recognized what the gospel leads us to recognize: in Christ, my impatience doesn’t disqualify me, for not only has that sin been paid for, but it has also been replaced by Jesus’ perfect patience. So my impatience has been paid for and replaced with Jesus’ patience! That means God does not judge you on the basis of your impatience, but rather on Christ’s patience, and his patience passes the test of perfection for you.
Now then, go and bear the fruit of that patience. Your impatience has been forgiven. It isn’t who you are. In Christ you are patient, so let the repentant fruit of patience flourish on the branches of your life. We don’t have to cover up what we aren’t anymore. In Christ, we can blossom into what he has made us: patient. We have everything to gain in dealing with others patiently. And I believe that patience can be one of the most notable qualities that Christians can demonstrate today if we are going to show how attractive grace is, because patience is sorely lacking in our world right now. It is a precious commodity that is exhibited far too infrequently. So let us make the most of the time we have, the year we have been given to allow God to dig around us and fertilize us with his Word and Sacrament, that we might produce abundant fruit of this habit of his grace, patience.