DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 4)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is. When I am on the receiving end of your compassion and see your capacity for forgiveness, it leaves me a changed man. To be freely welcomed and fully forgiven for all that I have ever done wrong is not only life-changing, but eternity-altering! With this as my reality, there is no place for bitterness or grudges against others when they sin against me. How can I possibly withhold forgiveness from anyone else while standing before a gracious Father who has not chosen to treat me that way? No, let my willingness to forgive others be a perfect reflection of your faithful willingness to forgive me. The world does not need more unmerciful servants, but more forgiving fathers. Help me to be one.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 3)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is. Regardless of which son we identify with – the prodigal young son or the prideful older son – we need the same thing: the forgiving father. And in you, we have just that!

As we stumble our way through this life and press on toward our heavenly home, some naturally assume that rigid rules and the threat of a strict, stern disciplinarian are necessary to keep everyone on track. But yours is a better way! Your unconditional love, your open arms, your warm welcome – these are what draw sinners to you. Moreover, it is your heart for us – not the terror or fear we feel – that keeps us on the path of your righteousness to the open door that leads to eternal life. You paid a dear price to be able to forgive us again and again and again, and the sacrifice of your own Son is our only hope for being welcomed to our eternal home. Oh, how we need a forgiving Father! And there you are, always welcoming this lost-on-his-own son, with open arms and gushing with grace. Thank you!

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 2)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is. The father’s compassionate patience toward his older son becomes even more real to us when our eyes are opened to see how often we are that older son. While grace is by definition undeserved, we cannot escape the notion that grace is for good people and not for bad people. In our own minds, we create a narrative in which we frame ourselves to be righteous, morally superior, and filled with good intentions. When we see grace extended to those who don’t have their act together like we do, we sulk and pout just as the older brother did.  

I confess to thinking so highly of myself and so little of others. Forgive me for failing to be honest when my acts of righteousness aren’t really out of loving gratitude for you, but rather to puff up myself and pad my own spiritual resumé. Strip me of my pride and lead me instead to rejoice every time your grace wins anyone over. Welcome this prideful sinner back again, as you have so many times before, with open arms and gushing with grace. 

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Guard Me against Glory-Seeking

Dear Father,
We live in an age when the internet and social media have created more ways than ever for people to become popular. Sometimes that popularity is merited, based on impressive accomplishments that were achieved through dedication and hard work. Other times, though, it seems to happen for reasons beyond anyone’s explanation. Getting noticed for either of those reasons is neither good nor bad necessarily, but pride can quickly see that things take a turn for the worse. 

I ask you to guard my heart from the desire to pursue popularity as a means of glory-seeking. There are noble pursuits to focus on which would serve the greater good in their own right, and then there are efforts simply to get known. Let me be so satisfied in being known and loved by you that I don’t need to crave the world’s validation or the glory that might come with it. Whatever glory the world can offer falls woefully short of the significance of belonging to you. Let that be more than enough for me.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

A Real Christmas Is (Not) All About You

(Luke 1:39-55)

Whether you have it on repeat or you skip it every time it comes on, the song is popular enough to engrain in our hearts and minds that Christmas is “the most wonderful time of the year.” Even if it’s been a while (or never) since you’ve sung carols in the snow (especially if you live in CA), toasted marshmallows, or gone “mistletoeing,” the song ushers in warm and fond memories of Christmases past that put us in the mood to celebrate once again. For so many, it really is the most wonderful time of the year.

But there’s another possible label that is very fitting for this time of year. It could also be known as “The Most Deceptive Time of the Year.” Consider how much of an emphasis is placed on giving. The expression “it’s better to give than to receive” probably gets more exposure during the month of December than it does the other eleven months of the year combined. Organizations have Giving Trees displayed to help those in need. Retailers even guilt us with the enticement to shop at their store to make sure you’re giving the perfect gift.

It might sound like I’m blasting all of those examples outright, as if they are inherently sinister or shady. That certainly isn’t the case. As they stand on their own, they are good reminders, and necessary ones, so that I don’t allow a season associated with gift exchanges to become entirely about what gifts I’m getting. 

No, the warning comes in recognizing how persistently our pride seeks to make everything – even giving – about us. Yes, our pride is such a master of disguise that it can even expertly hide behind something that on the surface appears to be all about other people. That’s why this season can be so deceptive. A season of giving and putting others first is simply another way for my pride to place itself on a pedestal for all to see.

Don’t underestimate our pride’s ability to hide behind giving. A whole season that is supposedly all about giving is the perfect cloak under which to hide my pride. So when I hear the reminder that it’s better to give than to receive, my pride perks up at the word “better,” and immediately zeros in on my own selfless acts of generosity and raises them up far above those other people who only complain about not getting this gift or that gift, or how cheap someone was toward them in their gift exchange. I don’t hesitate to impress others with my stories, making sure they haven’t missed the news of my participation in this Giving Tree campaign or that toy drive or that other cause for people in need. When others come to know me as the person who always gives such good gifts, is my giving really about finding that perfect gift for the other person or has it become more about keeping up that reputation of world’s greatest gift-giver? In each of these cases, can we see ourselves as the puffed up pharisee standing next to the tax collector, thanking God that he’s not more like that guy? It’s such a natural bent that we have toward sin that pride can even make something like giving all about me. Then we’re doing the opposite of everyone’s favorite Christmas magnet, “Keeping Christ in Christmas,” by taking out the “Christ” and replacing it with ourselves.

But here’s the rub: if we are going to experience a real Christmas this year, we have to come clean with our natural inclination to make it about us. As long as we imagine that the responsibility of making it a real Christmas or giving someone else a real Christmas, we’re going to end up with an artificial attempt that is worse than a fake tree so bad that not even Goodwill can unload it. So, want a real Christmas? Realize it’s not about you. 

Don’t you get a clear sense of that from both Mary and Elizabeth? Well, kind of, anyway. It was about them, but not about what they had done or achieved or about being recognized by others, but rather about what they had received: God’s grace. And as they express their amazement of being on the receiving end of such favor, they clearly realize how little they deserve it!

Appreciate first how Elizabeth reflected this. “In a loud voice she exclaimed: ‘Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear! But why am I so favored, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? As soon as the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!” (v.42-45). Elizabeth’s attitude wasn’t one of arrogant expectation that Mary would visit her, since she would after all be giving birth to John the Baptist, the forerunner of the Savior. No, she asks why she should be deemed worthy of a visit from the mother of the Savior of the world. That’s genuine humility! And following that, she belts out blessings to Mary, not praising her for any Mother Theresa-type good works or anything along those lines, but simply for having a humble faith that believed what God had promised to do for her. Remember, Mary was the one who came to visit Elizabeth,yet Elizabeth made it all about Mary.

Mary did something similar. She came to celebrate the good news with Elizabeth, but her celebration was all about her Savior. Her song, known historically in the church as the Magnificat, is a beautiful example of genuine humility. When Mary references herself, it is only in the context of being on the receiving end of what God has done and is still doing for her. Otherwise, the whole song is filled with “He” – as an ode to all of the amazing things that God has done and continues to do for his people. So both Elizabeth or Mary didn’t make it about themselves; they made it about their Savior. They humbly – yet jubilantly! – praised their Savior.

A real Christmas is about giving. But not about using giving as an outlet to put our pride into practice. And, even in those cases where our giving is genuine (and not a pretense for our pride), it’s still misguided if the intent of our giving is to somehow manufacture a “real’ Christmas. Instead, the kind of giving that makes for a real Christmas is giving Jesus the attention that Elizabeth and Mary did. 

And he deserves it, because as Mary confessed, in his mercy, he doesn’t give us what we deserve. “His mercy extends to those who fear him, from generation to generation” (v.50). “He has helped his servant Israel, remembering to be merciful to Abraham and his descendants forever…” (v.54-55a). God’s mercy means our pride no longer damns us! Mercy means God hasn’t treated our selfish pride as it deserves. Mercy means we have just as much reason to celebrate the Savior as Elizabeth and Mary did!

But for those not interested in that mercy, who prefer to remain in their pride, God has something for them, too. “He has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts. He has brought down rulers from their thrones…” (v.51-52a). Pride is nothing more than a human attempt at raising oneself above God, and God is no stranger to dealing with it. He has shown throughout history how he handles it, and he won’t hesitate to humble those insisting they have something of which to be proud.

But that is not God’s greatest desire. Think about it differently. If God’s greatest interest was merely behavior modification (for example, to make us more humble), if that’s all that Christianity was about – doing the right things and living the right way, then God would have addressed pride (and all other sin!) much differently. He would have sent his Son – but perhaps with a team of elite angels to sniff out sin and immediately punish it wherever they found it. That would get people to shape up very quickly, wouldn’t it?!?

But his preference is to show mercy. And Christmas is proof. God didn’t send his Son to change your behavior; he sent his Son to be your Savior. When we set aside our pride long enough to see that Christmas isn’t about us, that’s when we’re free to see Christ clearly, and see that… he already made Christmas all about us! 

Do you get it? When I make Christmas all about me, I suffer the most, because I am blinded to the reality that God already made Christmas all about me. If not, he would not have sent his Son to save. But he did, which is how you can be certain that Christmas is all about you.

When we know that Christmas is actually all about us – in the right way! – then we can revisit that whole matter of giving. And we can do so by following in the footsteps of humble Elizabeth and Mary. Yes, give. Give glory and praise to God this Christmas! Make Christmas about Christ. Give to God by going to church. Give to God by getting in the Word. Give to God by giving a special Christmas offering. Give to God by taking time over the twelve days of Christmas to consider how to give him more of you in the next year. Give thought to how you can make Mary’s words your own and how you can put those words into practice in your life: “My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior…” (v. 46-47). 

Stumbling Humbly

(Mark 9:30-37)

When it comes to following Jesus, we like to imagine our path is a pretty smooth and straight forward one. Like long distance runners in an olympic race, making their way around the track who knows how many times, once the race sets in the runners tend to fall in line, one after the other, behind the leader who sets the pace lap after lap. For the most part the race is uneventful until perhaps the end when runners jockey for that first place position ahead of the finish line.

However, it is much more likely that our race looks like the hurdler whose foot barely caught the hurdle just enough for him to stumble to the ground. He gets up to finish the race, but as he does, his noticeable limp and slower pace hamper him the rest of the way. He still finishes, but not in the form he had hoped or trained for for so long.

Following Jesus is not the smooth, perfectly paced race any of us would like to imagine ourselves having. It’s a stumble here and a fall there – sometimes even wandering off the track until we’re coached back on! Ironically, the very thing that blinds us to seeing how messy our race is as we follow Jesus is also one of the greatest causes of our messy race: our pride. In fact, pride isn’t interested in following anyone, but presumes that we ought to be the ones in the lead and everyone else ought to be following us! That’s why we struggle mightily with pride; it is never content to follow, but always thinks it should be out in front. 

Isn’t that really what happens when two people go back and forth over whether or not something was said? Rather than one person killing that foolishness with a simple, “I thought I had mentioned it, but I may be wrong, sorry,” or “You may have said it and I was distracted or just missed it, sorry,” neither side backs down, because pride insists on being out in front.

Isn’t pride also what really leads to political arguments? It’s not really about the candidate at all. Much more important is letting the other side know that their stupidity is responsible for their “wrong” vote and my superiority is to account for my “right” vote.

Pride has another nasty side. It is also pride that can debilitate me with worry or anxiety over everyone’s opinion of me. I become so convinced in my own head that everyone else must have thoughts or opinions about me all the time, instead of realizing I’m actually not even on their radar. And isn’t it pride that also results in depression? Even if I may legitimately be the victim of something hurtful, I remain in that role and convince myself that no one likes me and everyone is against me, and I always draw the short straw, making sure that my focus the whole time is on… me. 

That’s what pride does! It’s so self-absorbed that all of this talk of following anyone else, even Jesus, is utter nonsense to the natural pride-filled self. But if God can open our eyes to see what a stumbling mess our lives are, then maybe we could learn to follow him more humbly.

In Mark 9, God does just that. As we see ourselves in the disciples, our hope is that we learn from Jesus’ lesson to them. May Jesus’ humble service to and for us start to be reflected more and more through us as we follow him! 

Two incidents in the verses from Mark show how much room we have to grow. First, note that the disciples didn’t ask for more clarification when Jesus prophesied his death and resurrection. Imagine how different the Easter narrative might have been if they had!

If they had taken the time to ask Jesus to spell it out for them so they could understand exactly what he was telling them, the first Easter Sunday would have taken an entirely different tone. In place of uncertainty and fear and confusion, the believers might have been filled with excited expectation, anticipation, and pure elation. “Yes, it was a bitter pill to see the Savior die, but it had to happen just as he said it would, and now we can’t wait to see him again in just three days!” If they had had that kind of Easter understanding, how different the celebration of Easter would be in our day!

But why didn’t that ever happen? Because they were too proud. They lacked humility. As you read Mark, it may not sound like that initially, but let’s dig a little deeper. After Jesus had predicted his death and resurrection for them, Mark explained, “But they did not understand what he meant and were afraid to ask him about it” (v.32).

Sounds pretty harmless and totally relatable. We’ve all been there. We don’t want to look dumb by asking a foolish question. We don’t get something, we don’t understand it, but rather than seeking out greater understanding, we remain ignorant. Students do this in the classroom. Grownups do it in the workplace. We don’t fully grasp something, but we fail to ask about it out of a fear of looking stupid.

While we’re inclined to sympathize for the person in that situation, what’s really the underlying issue? What are we really saying when we admit that we’re afraid of looking stupid or foolish? We’re saying, “That would hurt my pride, so I’d rather not do that. I am more concerned about other people’s opinion of me than I am about seeking clarification or understanding. I can’t very well have others thinking less of me, because that would wound my pride too much. I think too much of myself to let others think less of me.”

Then, to take it to another level, remember that it’s Jesus – omniscient Jesus, all-knowing Jesus – in the picture. The disciples weren’t going to fool him! He knows thoughts and what is in the heart, so in refraining from asking for understanding, they couldn’t hide anything – including their pride – from Jesus.

The disciples’ lack of humility revealed itself again immediately following that incident. When they got to where they were staying, Jesus asked them, “‘What were you arguing about on the road?’ But they kept quiet because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest” (v.33-34). Jesus’ question was like that of the father interrogating the child he already knows is guilty. He wasn’t looking for information as much as a confession, an admission of wrongdoing. The most shocking part? “They kept quiet…”

Can you imagine Jesus asking you a question and… not answering?!? That’s hard enough to do to a teacher, a parent, or a boss, but to not respond when the Son of God asks you a question?!? Whoa! What could possibly cause these faithful followers to clam up and close their lips when Jesus Christ asked them a question? 

Guilt. Guilt sewed their lips shut. And what was the cause of their guilt? “…because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest” (v.34). The other Gospels provide us with some details about the subject matter surrounding their “who’s the greatest” debate. But we also know they were just on the Mt. of Transfiguration, so the three from Jesus’ inner circle – Peter, James, and John – certainly must have had a leg up on the competition, at least in their own minds. And even when we’re told the other disciples took issue with their arguing over who was the greatest, their concern only revealed a lack of humility, for each one of them surely thought he deserved to be a part of such a debate! 

What mattered more than their pride-puffing resumes, however, was bursting their bubble and teaching them that followers of Jesus value humility over pride.

But before we sit in on Jesus’ teaching on humility, let’s recall why humility is such a big deal in God’s eyes in the life of the Christian as he follows Jesus. It is more than a noble virtue to pursue. It is not just another way for the Christian to let his light shine in a world overpopulated with pride. No, humility is big in God’s book because our whole relationship with him is based on it. 

Without humility, there can be no submission to God. Where humility is absent, so is the willingness to listen to and apply the Word of God. Where pride reigns supreme, it views Jesus not as Lord or Master, but as servant. Where pride is present, I call the shots and expect God to operate according to my plans and purposes, and should he choose not to, then my pride has no time for him. Pride remains blind to everything God has done for me because it refuses to see my need for it.

Now then, knowing that Jesus was fully aware of his disciples’ pride as well as our own, do you see the grace that is seeping through the words Jesus spoke? He said, “The Son of Man is going to be delivered into the hands of men. They will kill him, and after three days he will rise” (v.31). Jesus knew their pride and ours. It was not hidden from him.

Yet it changed nothing. The plan did not change because of man’s pride that would potentially disregard the very sacrifice and resurrection Jesus predicted; rather pride was exactly why the plan stayed the same!

Pride – our pride – was precisely why the Son of man had to be handed over, tortured, and murdered. Our pride needed to be pinned to the cross and paid for. So Jesus did that for us. Jesus, knowing the hearts and minds of men who think they know better than the heart and mind of God, still died. In Jesus Christ, God, whose perfection alone would justify pride, traded it willingly for perfect humility, putting himself beneath every insubordinate sinner, to offer salvation for all people.

That sacrificial act of holy humility changes us. It changes how we follow Jesus. So we eagerly want to hear what Jesus has to say about humility.

To teach that point, Jesus used a little kid. Jesus explained, “Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all.” He took a little child whom he placed among them. Taking the child in his arms, he said to them, “Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me” (v.35-37). If we are to understand Jesus’ point, we have to let go of our society’s modern-day view of children that elevates the role of the child to what amounts to being the head of the household. Many parents today are more concerned about catering to their children than they are about parenting them.

In Jesus’ day, children were viewed quite differently. They were another mouth to feed and a body to clothe. Children were viewed as a liability, not an asset. So Jesus was essentially telling the disciples that humility was looking up to those on whom society looked down. It was putting self lower than those we naturally tend to place ourselves over. Humility was not “me first,” but “you first.”

See your followership of Jesus the way it really is and not as you pretend it to be. It’s messy. We’re going to stumble more often than not. But rather than trying to hide it or cover it up, embrace it as the humble reminder of how much we all need Jesus. Then, leaving our pride more and more in the rearview mirror, let’s stumble humbly as we continue to follow Jesus together. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Keep My Pride in Check

Dear Lord,
Pride has been called the carbon monoxide sin, as its presence so often goes undetected in my life. It is a toxic poison that so easily seeps into my attitude and my thinking. My pride seeks to dethrone you in my life and assume the role of lord and master for myself. It demands to be recognized and respected by others and refuses to back down or be wrong. My pride wants to magnify my name always more than yours.

But since pride is such a master at disguising itself, I don’t always recognize it. Pour out your Spirit in rich measure to help me pinpoint my pride and kill it before it assumes control in any situation. Help others around me tune into it as well, and when they see it in me, to firmly rebuke it when it arises. Enable me to keep my pride in check by daily submitting to you and seeking your will and direction for my life. Be patient with me and never tire of forgiving my rebellious pride and replacing it with your humble righteousness.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

Calling All Pharisees!

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There’s a pharisee in all of us.

If that shocks you, or if you think you are an exception to this statement, that could actually serve as an indicator that you may even be a bigger pharisee than you realize.  To clarify, I am not using that term the way you’ll come across it in the Bible, referring to the religious sect who opportunistically opposed Jesus and had an unhealthy infatuation with rule-keeping (though we can at times fall into that category, too!). When I say there’s a Pharisee in all of us, I refer to the root sense of the word, our inclination to separate ourselves from others.

Sometimes we physically do this by avoiding certain types of people, but most often it happens in our head. And here’s why it’s particularly tricky: we may not separate ourselves from others because we think we’re better than they are, but rather… because we think they’re not as good as we are. Sounds like the same thing, doesn’t it?

Essentially it is, but when we spin our perspective, it doesn’t feel so bad to us. See, if in my own mind I don’t make it about me and how highly I think of me, then it becomes that much easier to pinpoint the myriad flaws in others. That way, we’re not hypocrites. We’re not egotistical. We’re not prideful. And we genuinely become blind to our hypocrisy, egotism, and pride, simply because we’ve shifted the focus onto others. When it becomes about others not measuring up or not meeting a standard or not being good enough, I internally justify it because, after all, “I’m not saying I’m better than they are (but really, I am!), I’m just making the same outward observation anyone else could about their shortcoming(s) (which clearly aren’t shortcomings for me – otherwise I wouldn’t so readily notice them in others!).” 

Want to try something radical? Shift your perspective. Start with the assumption that others are better than you, and be intentional about looking for evidence in them that supports your assumption.

Finally, at the end of each day, be grateful for the One who truly was better than you, who through faith in him chooses to bless you with his own prideless perfection and wholehearted humility. 

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who… made himself nothing… humbled himself and became obedient to death–even death on a cross!”

Philippians 2:3, 6–8 (NIV)