DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 4)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is.
When I am on the receiving end of your compassion and see your capacity for forgiveness, it leaves me a changed man. To be freely welcomed and fully forgiven for all that I have ever done wrong is not only life-changing, but eternity-altering! With this as my reality, there is no place for bitterness or grudges against others when they sin against me. How can I possibly withhold forgiveness from anyone else while standing before a gracious Father who has not chosen to treat me that way? No, let my willingness to forgive others be a perfect reflection of your faithful willingness to forgive me. The world does not need more unmerciful servants, but more forgiving fathers. Help me to be one.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 3)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is. Regardless of which son we identify with – the prodigal young son or the prideful older son – we need the same thing: the forgiving father. And in you, we have just that!

As we stumble our way through this life and press on toward our heavenly home, some naturally assume that rigid rules and the threat of a strict, stern disciplinarian are necessary to keep everyone on track. But yours is a better way! Your unconditional love, your open arms, your warm welcome – these are what draw sinners to you. Moreover, it is your heart for us – not the terror or fear we feel – that keeps us on the path of your righteousness to the open door that leads to eternal life. You paid a dear price to be able to forgive us again and again and again, and the sacrifice of your own Son is our only hope for being welcomed to our eternal home. Oh, how we need a forgiving Father! And there you are, always welcoming this lost-on-his-own son, with open arms and gushing with grace. Thank you!

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 2)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is. The father’s compassionate patience toward his older son becomes even more real to us when our eyes are opened to see how often we are that older son. While grace is by definition undeserved, we cannot escape the notion that grace is for good people and not for bad people. In our own minds, we create a narrative in which we frame ourselves to be righteous, morally superior, and filled with good intentions. When we see grace extended to those who don’t have their act together like we do, we sulk and pout just as the older brother did.  

I confess to thinking so highly of myself and so little of others. Forgive me for failing to be honest when my acts of righteousness aren’t really out of loving gratitude for you, but rather to puff up myself and pad my own spiritual resumé. Strip me of my pride and lead me instead to rejoice every time your grace wins anyone over. Welcome this prideful sinner back again, as you have so many times before, with open arms and gushing with grace. 

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

Prayers from the Prodigal (Part 1)

Forgiving Father,
Through the “lost” parables in Luke 15, we become aware of how radical your grace truly is. The father’s compassionate welcome of his wayward younger son becomes even more real to us when our eyes are opened to see how often we are that younger son. Rather than finding joy and satisfaction being in the presence of his father, he chose to chase after material things. Rather than faithfully serving his father and family at home, he served himself and went his own way. 

I see myself in him so often! To have you is not enough – I deceive myself into thinking that the world has something that will satisfy me more, so I chase after this and that, only to end up empty-handed. I live for me rather than for you and my fellow believers and my neighbors in need. When I fall into these traps, turn me, like the younger son, away from it all and lead me to run back to you with a repentant heart. Welcome this selfish sinner back again, as you have so many times before, with open arms and gushing with grace. 

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Love Radically For My Neighbor’s Sake

Loving Jesus,
While loving my enemy does not come easily, one of the blessings of putting that kind of radical love into practice is that I am displaying for others how radical your love for them is. When I avoid judging them, I am showing them a God who doesn’t judge them as they deserve. When I do not condemn them, I am showing them a God who doesn’t condemn as they deserve. When I forgive them unconditionally, I am showing them a God who forgives them unconditionally. When I pour good into their lives, I am showing them the God who is the source of all those good things. So then, when the opportunity to love my enemy arises, I ask you to grant me an increase of faith in you and all that you have done for me, so that I may faithfully and confidently love radically, and thereby show my enemy a God who loves HIM radically, too. 

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Love Radically For My Own Sake

Loving Jesus,
While loving my enemy does not come easily, one of the blessings of putting that kind of radical love into practice is that I am displaying a confident belief in your radical love for me. Only when I am certain that you have not judged me am I able to withhold judging others. Only when I am certain that you have not condemned me am I able to avoid condemning others. Only when I am certain that you have forgiven me am I able to forgive others. Only when I see how much goodness you have poured into my life am I able to pour good into the lives of others. So then, when the opportunity to love my enemy arises, I ask you to grant me an increase of faith in you and all that you have done for me, so that I may faithfully and confidently love radically, as I KNOW you have loved me.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Imitate Joseph

Forgiving Father,
When Joseph revealed himself to his brothers visiting him in Egypt, two things stood out about his handling of the situation that I want to imitate. First, even with all the traumatic experiences in his past that had taken place to get him to that point, he displayed complete confidence in your navigation of it all for the greater good. He knew you were using those seasons of adversity, during which he must have felt hopeless at times, to ultimately bless and save many lives through his leadership. Remind me during hard seasons in my life of how capable you are of bringing your blessing out of any situation imaginable, and lead me to trust that you are doing just that.

Secondly, even though Joseph was in a position to ignore, shame, severely punish, or even put to death his brothers for their past treatment of him, he harbored no ill will and showed them nothing but love and affection. How hard this is when others mistreat me! I prefer to ruminate over how poorly I was treated, bathe in bitterness, or scheme to get even in some fashion. But Joseph’s is the better way, because it is your way. You did not treat those who mistreated you the way they deserved to be treated. Instead, you forgave them; you forgave me. Give me the same spirit that is eager to forgive and reconcile, no matter the wrong carried out against me, just as Joseph and Jesus did.  

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

DAILY PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Not Withhold Forgiveness

Forgiving Father,
Help me forgive others. While forgiveness is central to the Christian faith, there are times I struggle to forgive others. There are some sins, some hurts, some wrongs, that are just difficult to move past, whether directed at me or others. Other times the issue is that I manufacture my own ideas of behavior or words that I demand to see from others so that I can determine if they are remorseful enough to deserve my forgiveness. 

But that isn’t how forgiveness works when you extend it to me. Neither should I allow it to be my approach when forgiving others. Help me to let go of anything I might harbor in my heart that would hinder me from freely forgiving others. When my own self-righteousness, bitterness, or resentment interfere with my forgiving of others, sweep such sin out of my heart. Instead, let my forgiveness be full and swift, no matter the wrong committed or the individual who committed it. In that way let my forgiveness toward others imitate your forgiveness toward me.  

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

PRAYERS FOR GUYS

To Forgive Others

Merciful Father,
Forgiveness is foundational to my faith. Indeed, it is why I can even approach you with my prayers in the first place. No words or expression of my thanks could ever fully capture how grateful I am for your forgiveness.

Yet as appreciative as I am for your willingness to forgive me, still I struggle more than I should with forgiving others. There are those whose actions have left me with significant scars. There are others who have carried out unimaginably despicable things against others. In cases like these, it can be easier for me to withhold my forgiveness and to bear a grudge. I know better, yet I remain bitter. 

In such cases, fix my eyes to your cross, where I see again the price you paid for my forgiveness. Remind me that even though I daily give you every reason to bear a grudge against me, to remain bitter toward me, and to withhold your forgiveness from me, instead you choose to forgive all of my sin. Always. Give me your grace to always forgive others in that same way.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen. 

A Quick-to-Forgive Church

(Genesis 50:15-21)

Joseph’s life has all the makings of an unforgettable revenge story. Jealous brothers plotted his murder. After having tempered their resentment a bit, however, they settled for selling him as a slave instead. Then, despite exceptional performance reviews and a very respectable reputation as a servant in his master’s house, Joseph’s world came crashing down again. He was the victim of vindictive lies and slander that not only ruined his reputation, but landed him in prison. Even in prison, despite his commendable behavior restoring his good name and the assistance he provided to others in his God-given interpretations of their dreams, he was still forgotten and overlooked for a time by those he helped.

Finally, though, the door opened up for him to ascend to the role of the most powerful man in Egypt next to Pharaoh himself! That’s when the opportunity for what surely could have been one of the most memorable stories of revenge presented itself. His brothers found themselves unknowingly in his presence, completely at his mercy while seeking aid for their starving families. Oh, how Joseph could have unleashed his wrath as a result of decades of pent-up spite, bitterness, and resentment! It would have been a story for the ages!

And it was. It still is. But not for the reason we might have expected; not for revenge. Instead, it’s a story for the ages because of something far more powerful than revenge: Joseph’s choice to forgive his brothers. 

As The Church God Wants series wraps up, it shouldn’t surprise us at that God desires that his Church – that believers – be quick to forgive. Forgiveness is both how and why the Church even exists in the first place! The Church is not just the beneficiary of forgiveness, but its executor as well. We receive it and we distribute it. We are filled up with it and we fill others up with it. If there is one thing the Church is to do and be known for, it must always be forgiveness.

Why is that? Because no other group or institution in society bears that responsibility. Your employer is not required to teach or model forgiveness to you. “Forgiveness 101” is not a required course of study in our public schools or higher education institutions. Your kid’s coach or piano teacher is not being paid or volunteering to help your child learn about forgiveness. The government has not established any rules or regulations to foster forgiveness by threat of fine or jail time (which would of course be a bit ironic). Finally, while in many cities you will have no problem finding community centers, homeless shelters, and food pantries, I have yet to hear of anything resembling a “forgiveness facility.” 

You won’t find such things elsewhere because even society – non-believers and believers alike – realizes that forgiveness is really the church’s business. Forgiveness has historically been understood to be the church’s responsibility.

For that reason, those outside the church tend to pay very close attention when those who belong to it – Christians – fail to forgive. Even they recognize that’s what the Church exists to do… even if they don’t fully recognize the how or why, which is of course one and the same: Jesus.

The Church forgives because the Church exists as a result of Jesus’ forgiveness. Remove his perfect life of obedience from the equation and his death on the cross would not have mattered. Take away his death on the cross and the empty tomb would not have been possible. Do away with the empty tomb, leaving a still-dead-today Jesus, and his payment would have been insufficient and death and hell would still reign. 

But, since we have all of those and everything else that we need in Jesus, we have forgiveness. As long as the church has Jesus, she has all she needs to continue as the source of freely-flowing forgiveness. That means we have something both to receive and to give. What is our part in that? Our role involves both hearing and speaking that forgiveness and each case, for various reasons, sometimes that is very difficult and sometimes it comes quite easily.

When it comes to hearing that forgiveness, it can at times be one of the hardest things of all to hear and at other times the sweetest music to our ears. What accounts for the difference? How could forgiveness ever be hard to hear?

When we don’t feel we need it. After all, when a person has “done nothing wrong,” then there’s nothing to forgive. And that would be true… if we could ever actually figure out how to avoid all wrongdoing. Our shortcoming, however, is our failure to see our wrong or identify it as such. If we spent as much time simply owning our sin and confessing it as we do denying it, excusing it, or blaming others for it, then there would be less kicking and screaming and insisting on our innocence and more reconciliation and healing. 

Those are the times when forgiveness is pure music to our ears – when our guilty ears long to hear it and our troubled hearts know we need it. When the law has done its job and exposed me as the fraud I am in so many ways, I am ready to receive the sweet freedom that only the gospel of forgiveness offers. When my stubbornness, my grudge-bearing, my refusal to forgive others, my selfishness, my stinging words, my neglect of God, my reckless spending – when all of this becomes clearly evident and our guilt won’t let go, then we crave the assurance that Jesus gives. Then we soak up his forgiveness. At those times we cannot hear it too much. 

Hearing forgiveness can be hard or easy, depending on how ready our hearts are to receive it. But speaking words of forgiveness can challenge us as well. Sometimes the words are difficult to speak and other times forgiveness seems to ease effortlessly from our lips. Why is that? How could forgiveness ever be hard to speak? When we feel the other person doesn’t deserve it.

But we must stop right there and be very clear about something before we go on. 

It’s only a worldly – and therefore rather limited and virtually impotent – version of forgiveness that attaches any sense of requirement to it. Only the world speaks of forgiveness in terms of the guilty party somehow being deserving enough or sorry enough or pitiful enough for forgiveness. In other words, it’s a limited forgiveness, a conditional one. 

But God’s forgiveness that extends through his Church is not at all like that. It isn’t limited. It isn’t conditional. It isn’t at all dependent on how deserving the recipient may or may not be, because it is entirely grace-based. That means it isn’t ever deserved and cannot ever be earned. So the kind of forgiveness that is withheld because someone has determined the guilty party doesn’t deserve it is not the kind of forgiveness found in the church. 

When we find it difficult to forgive others, it’s because we’re focused on the world’s “forgiveness” and not the Church’s. That happens when we focus on the wrong itself and how awful it was or the wrongdoer himself and how awful he is to have committed it. Where either the gravity of the wrong committed or the degree of wickedness of the wrongdoer himself is the determining factor, forgiveness will always be conditional.

That also means it will be subjective. One person who determines the wrong or the wrongdoer wasn’t really that bad may find it easy to forgive, while another person may struggle mightily with the same sin because of a different personal experience or perception of that sin. So the kind of forgiveness dependent on the gravity of the crime or the wickedness of the perpetrator – a forgiveness not sanctioned in the Bible, by the way – will always be hard to speak. 

Other times, though, words of forgiveness are come easily. When?

When we focus not on the wrongdoer, but on our forgiver, Jesus. Yes, you read that right – when we focus on our forgiver. That is always the best and necessary place to start. I need to put myself at the center of the investigation and lay bare my whole history, my whole track record of sin, remembering all the despicable stuff I’ve done.

Then, when I realize that God has not withheld his forgiveness for any one of my sins, but that Jesus’ blood has covered and washed away every last one, it seems downright laughable that I should stand before someone else and pretend that his wrong is the exception. How absurd that I could accept that my sin should be cancelled but that his sin could not possibly be. Those are the moments when it hits me why Jesus told the story of the unmerciful servant in Matthew 18. He wanted to convict me of how ludicrous it is of me to ever withhold forgiveness from someone else until they _______________ (fill in the blank with any requirement you’d like to attach).

No, forgiveness comes so much more easily when I look first at who has forgiven me. When I see Jesus nailed to the cross, imagining a banner with the words, “Paid in full” over him, I see no ground to stand on where I can withhold Jesus’ same payment from someone else. No matter what they’ve done. No matter how much what they did hurt me. No matter how much ongoing damage it causes me. No matter how much I might still be processing it even years later.

When I let go of the burden of trying to pretend the heavy weight of dispensing forgiveness is mine to bear and instead remember that Jesus already carried that weight and earned my forgiveness, then I can freely and fully forgive others. 

That’s why Joseph wept. He had already forgiven his brothers. But he was finding out how hard it can be for that forgiveness to sink in. He had forgiven his brothers 17 years ago, and here they were still terrified that the real punishment they deserved was going to be be exacted upon them after their dad died and Joseph no longer had to “fake” forgiveness. 

But in place of the retribution his brothers expected, they received reassurance. Instead of demanding restitution from his brothers for all the harm they had done to him, he promised to provide for all their families’ needs. No revenge, just forgiveness in its place. Joseph didn’t dwell on the damage his brothers had done to him, but rather on the good God had worked through him. “But Joseph said to them, ‘Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.’ And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them” (v.19-21)

Notice something rather profound in Joseph’s words. He knew full well the responsibility of making sure justice was carried out perfectly was not his, but God’s. “Am I in the place of God,” he asked. Of course not!

However, we are, in a sense, in the place of God today. We are in the place of God when we apply his forgiveness to others who know they need it. We are in the place of God when we withhold that forgiveness from God for those who see no sin in themselves that needs forgiving. God has given that responsibility to his church to forgive, as he has forgiven us. Then alone do we stand in the place of God, as if God himself were the one pronouncing his forgiveness upon a penitent sinner. That is exactly what God wants in us. That is exactly the kind of church God wants – a quick-to-forgive church. May we always be just that, and may others always see that when they look at us.