It can feel a bit like a sucker punch when it happens. It can happen in a number of different ways, but somehow you discover that a friendship you share with someone doesn’t have the same level of closeness for the other person as it does for you. It may have became obvious that you were just being used as a means to an end when interaction in the friendship comes to a halt after they got what they wanted. Or something that you shared in confidence was shared with another person. Or you heard through the grapevine that this friend supposedly shared something rather negative about you with someone else.
It stings. It hurts to find out that a friendship or relationship with someone that you valued highly does not carry the same weight for them as you thought it did.
While John doesn’t use the word “friendship” in these verses, his use of the word “fellowship” certainly includes the idea of it. Fellowship is often the term used to describe relationships that exist within the church of believers. However, there really is one fellowship, one friendship we have that matters more than all others – our relationship with God. In these verses John draws attention to both that special fellowship, as well as the fellowship with other believers which flows from that.
He explains, “We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ” (v.3). The reality of Jesus’ Resurrection is that it cements the blessings of fellowship we share both with Christ and with his church, with all believers. Those bonds, those relationships and friendships, surpass all others, not only in their quality, but in their duration: they will be forever!
This blessing of fellowship that Christians share is vastly underrated and underutilized today. The way John speaks about it here directly dismisses today’s common take on religion/spirituality – one that has crept its way into Christianity, too – that one’s faith is only between God and that person. “I don’t need to belong to a church or attend one to have faith in God. I can feed my faith and grow in my faith on my own in so many ways nowadays. The significance and role of the church isn’t what it used to be. It just isn’t as necessary as it used to be.” That approach actually reveals a level of immaturity and misunderstanding, not to mention selfishness, when it comes to understanding church and fellowship. While it’s true that faith in Jesus is personal, it isn’t private, nor did God ever intend it to be.
John stated very clearly his purpose for passing on his eyewitness testimony, and it wasn’t only for others to be brought into fellowship with God, but also with God’s people: “…so that you also may have fellowship with us” (v.3). No one is ever just brought to faith in Jesus, but also into fellowship with believers. And that is God’s intent, since he uses fellowship to funnel his blessings to us – and through us to others!
Consider the imagery that the apostlePaul often refers to in his letters when talking about believers. When he writes about the different ways God has gifted individuals within the church, he likens it to a body (see Romans 12 & 1 Corinthians 12). A body has lots of different parts and unique responsibilities, but as each carries out its own unique task, the whole body ends up being served.
That picture of the body also captures the oneness, the unity, the fellowship within the church, which flows from the body being connected not only to all the respective parts, but also to Christ, the head. Without the head, the rest of the connections would be meaningless, because the body could not exist. But with Christ as the head, connected to the rest of the body, the body functions in harmony and with purpose. Each part is valued and appreciated, and each part carries out its work to serve the whole body, not just its own selfish purposes. It’s a beautiful thing – and it’s real.
How can we be sure though? When we’ve been burned before by past relationships that still sting, how can we be sure it will be any different within the church? Because of the Resurrection.
It’s understandable that we may not get it at first. Neither did Thomas. Thomas was not with the disciples that Easter evening when Jesus appeared to them. The reports of Jesus being raised from the dead had been pouring in all around, from the women as well as those disciples in the upper room. Yet Thomas struggled to believe it could be true because he wasn’t present to witness it and experience it himself. Not only did he have his doubts – he didn’t even try to hide them or keep them to himself. He bluntly expressed to the others that he refused to believe what his own senses were not able to confirm!
Surely that doubt left an impression on the disciples who had seen and touched the risen Jesus, to the point that it made John aware of how natural it was for others to doubt or be skeptical of the Resurrection. For that reason, John emphasized that he and the other disciples could confirm the Resurrection because they weren’t settling for some second-hand report about it. Rather, they themselves were eyewitnesses.
“That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched—this we proclaim concerning the Word of life. The life appeared; we have seen it and testify to it, and we proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to us. We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard…” (v.1-3a). Since in Christ, God really dwelled among men, and John and others really witnessed it, what we have in him is real. Since they witnessed a very alive Jesus, the Resurrection was real. Therefore, what we have here within the church – is real.
The older I get, the more I can relate to what John repeatedly expresses in his letters – that he has no greater joy than to see his children walk in love and truth. Seeing Christians connect with each other is a joy. When those connections are real and strong and meaningful, it’s a beautiful reminder of what God does and continues to do when he builds up his church. It’s built through the Word and the Sacrament, but don’t discount that what God is also building is real relationships with each other through the good news of the gospel, which is rooted in the Resurrection of Jesus. It’s real, and so is our connection with each other because of it.
John isn’t just passing along theological bullet points here, either. He is talking about real relationships that exist within the body of Christ because Christ is risen. And just as he does in his other letters, here too, he highlights that those real relationships are for him a source of joy. His final words in these verses capture that. “We write this to make our joy complete” (v.4). It fills John with joy to see the fellowship that Christians share.
In fact, his joy doesn’t reach its fullest potential until he communicates it to others. Yes, John himself knows Jesus. He knows he’s forgiven. He knows heaven is his home. He knows a Jesus joy and peace that cannot be experienced ever anywhere in this world apart from him.
Yet even with all of that, John is still lacking… until he writes and tells others about it. Then his joy is complete. It has to be expressed, both to his fellow believers (to whom he’s writing) and to others who through his gospel message might be brought into the same fruit-bearing fellowship with Jesus and his church.
What is keeping you from discovering that same joy? Skepticism? A refusal to open up because you’ve been burned in the past? Drifting away from Jesus and his church? Letting misplaced priorities rob you of the genuine joy of Christian fellowship?
If I drew a picture of circles within a larger circle and each shrinking circle represented greater engagement and connection and commitment to Jesus and his church, with the very center of the circle being the absolute most engaged a person could ever be in their congregation, which circle would you place yourself in?
Are you on the fringe – you’re listed in the directory but hardly know anyone and when you show up, others take you for a guest? Are you a step inside that circle? You attend occasionally enough to know a few faces but aren’t really interested in more than that? Are you one step inside that circle? You attend pretty regularly, perhaps your children are enrolled in the school, you give regularly and are likely to sign up for things? Are you a step inside that, actively attending a Bible class or small group, and serving consistently? Are you inside that, leading others, giving generously, and regularly making your joy complete by telling others about Jesus as John did? Which circle would you place yourself in, and what would it take to work on getting closer to the center?
The bonds that are forged and fortified within the church are different than any other because the foundation of those bonds is different. When Jesus is what we have in common, then we have something far more substantial than just a common interest or cause. It’s not like joining a Facebook Group of hikers that you check periodically when you’re planning a hike. No one will check in on you if you don’t post or comment for weeks or months. You can be as engaged as much or as little as you like. You have no real commitment or responsibility to the group.
But when Jesus is the basis of our bond, we have from him all that we need. We also have from him anything that others might need from us. He won’t make a promise he can’t keep. His feelings toward us are not conditional. His love and forgiveness toward us are not based on the merit of our contributions to the group. When HE is the shared bond, then HE provides all that we need.
Not only does he do that for us in Word and Sacrament; he also does it through us as we fellowship with one another. When you think of the ways we experience the blessings of Jesus in our lives, so many of those are experienced through fellow believers.
A girlfriend patiently listens to and cares about your frustrations over coffee. A godly man that you admire greatly offers marriage advice when you hit a rough patch. An anonymous gift buoyed you up when you were struggling financially. The prayers that you never heard that were being offered up for you. The conversations others were having about how best to help you in your time of need. The care and concern shown when you were drifting away. The focused accountability to remind you of your commitments and the importance of carrying them out. The compassion expressed in so many ways when you were hurting.
Many of us can testify that we experience these things to a greater degree within our church family than we do even within our biological family! This is the fellowship that we have in Christ that John is celebrating. It’s real, because Jesus and his Resurrection are real.
Do you want to experience this level of connection and fellowship, but wonder how to? Then foster that fellowship. Attend a Bible class. Sign up to serve. Show up for activities. Worship together. Offer to help others. The list is endless. Make my joy complete by taking the next step. Better yet, put a smile on Jesus’ face by being deliberate about growing in your faith and fellowship. Oh, and you can be sure you’ll end up finding plenty of joy yourself, too. It’s real – as real as the Resurrection!