Victorious Over Grief

(John 16:16-24)

Agree or disagree? Christians are better off than non-Christians. You might presume that how a person answers that question depends on whether or he or she is a Christian. If you are not a Christian, you would likely disagree with the statement (otherwise you’d have become a Christian, right?). If you are a Christian, then you might either agree or disagree. One Christian might have a number of unbelieving friends who appear to have great lives, while another Christian might completely agree on the basis of God’s promises in Jesus, he is always better off. 

Either way, the point is not to nail down who is better off, but rather to nudge us to think about exactly what criteria we’d consider to determine our stance. If the criteria is based on circumstances or situations, then disappointment will always follow. At that same time, how is it that some Christians who have endured exhausting lives are some of the most joy-filled people you’ll ever meet?

That would seem to go against the flow of conventional thinking. We tend to think that joy and happiness exist in the absence of adversity, not in the presence of it. How then does one explain it? How can some who have had a very rough life still be so full of joy? Let Jesus explain for us this morning. 

Be ready, though, because his words might catch you off guard. “Very truly I tell you, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve… A woman giving birth to a child has pain  because her time has come; So with you: Now is your time of grief…” (v.20-22a). Jesus plainly states that life right now will be painful and hard! So for those who aren’t Christians, after reading that, let me try to read your mind. I’m guessing you hear those words and say to yourself, “Where do I sign up??? This whole Christian thing sounds like a blast!”

Now you can be turned off by that, embittered by that, resentful of Jesus for that… or you can be comforted, because as it turns out, Jesus was a straight-shooter with us. He didn’t paint some pretend pollyanna promise for us, but gave it to us like it is.

If you’ve ever watched the WandaVision series, it’s based on a main super-hero character who has gone through some heavy trauma. In response, she fabricates an ideal “Leave it to Beaver”-type life. Her husband and family are perfect. Her neighbors are perfect and the neighborhood is perfect. Everything is perfect.

Jesus didn’t pretend. He said, “Life will stink. Life will be hard.” And he told us this not to embitter us, but to prepare us, so that when we encounter that reality, we aren’t shocked, we aren’t surprised or taken aback. Rather, we conclude, “Huh, it’s just like Jesus said it would be.” 

Now some may take issue with this because they’ve been sold on the idea that if there’s really something to this whole God thing, then nothing bad should ever happen in the world. However, that starts with a the false premise that the world could even come to an agreement on what is good (e.g., is the right to have an abortion good or not?)! All we have to do is ask opinions on hot-button issues and we see very quickly that no two people agree on what “good” is. Therefore, how could God possibly satisfy every individual’s idea of good in the face of so much contradiction?

Another thought presumes that if the world is good and bad things happen, then those bad things stand as evidence against God. But what if, on the basis of all-too-common atrocities like church and store shootings we flip that thought around: the world actually isn’t a good place – it’s a bad one! Then any good experience at all in such a bad world would be evidence of a good God!

Friends, if Jesus tells us what to expect now, and it plays out just like he said it would, doesn’t that grab our attention? If it’s just like Jesus said it would be now, doesn’t that give Jesus more credibility when he also tells us what it’s going to be like later? Doesn’t that make us think twice before dismissing what he says about our future as well?

If a year ago your financial advisor predicted accurately exactly where your tanking investments would be today, as tough a pill as it might be to swallow, wouldn’t you have more faith in him, not less, despite a plummeting portfolio? Wouldn’t you feel more confident with someone like that managing your retirement than an advisor who predicted earth-shattering gains, only to have to come up with some excuse or explanation for why he was so horribly mistaken? 

So let’s look at what else Jesus promises in these words, for they are far from all gloom and doom! “Your grief will turn to joy” (v.20)… “you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy” (v.22)… “your joy will be complete” (v.24). That’s Jesus repeating himself quite a bit in just these few verses – you think maybe there is a point he’s trying to get across? What was to be the source of all this joy?

In this case, it was Jesus promising his disciples that death wouldn’t have the last word, but that he would return to them from the grave. In his first words of this section, “Jesus went on to say, ‘In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me’” (v.16). In a few days, Jesus would die and his disciples would not see him. Three days after that, however, they would see him again after he rose from the dead. He would vacate his tomb and through his victorious resurrection restore their joy. He would permanently rewrite the story so that death would not be the end. Gut-wrenching grief would give birth to the most jubilant joy!

For us that joy doubles, for not only do we have the benefit of looking back to see that Jesus made good on his promise to the disciples, but we also have the joy of looking ahead to his return on the last day when he ushers in eternal victory! Even before that, the assurance of Jesus’ resurrection and undoing of death makes a world of difference in the face of the ultimate grief of losing a loved one. 

It has not escaped my notice over the course of my life that there is a drastic difference in how people of other religions or no religion speak in the face of death compared to how Christians speak at the death of fellow Christians. I have observed others speak of a hope or an optimism that their loved one is in a better place, but noticeably lacking in that hope and optimism is any confidence. The Christian, though, even through countless tears, is able to confidently find peace not in hoping or being optimistic, but in knowing their loved one is in heaven. 

And before one writes off such confidence as misguided arrogance, realize that the difference comes from the founder himself. The best every other religion or religious figure or book ever promises is a chance at eternal life if the individual has been good enough.

Not so with Jesus! Jesus promises eternal life to all who are in him. So call him a liar, dismiss his promise, but at least acknowledge that the Christian’s confidence in the face of death is based on a very real and very clear promise, and not possibility, which is the best every other religion claims. And being fully confident of what the future holds is why many a Christian is so filled with joy in the present, right now. Yes, even in the face of grieving. Even in the face of adversity. 

We have an elementary school at my church, and in the morning I am there to greet kids an parents as they arrive at school. I think if you were to ask the students and parents how many times they’ve seen me in a bad or bitter mood, they wouldn’t likely recall any. But if you think that’s becuase I’ve never had a bad day or had anything go wrong on any of those mornings, you’d be wrong! Of course I have! We all have!

But still there is joy – every single day there is joy. Why? Jesus. My joy comes as a result of confidence of knowing exactly who I am in Jesus Christ, and the joy of knowing exactly what my future in Jesus Christ holds. In Jesus I am forgiven. In Jesus I am loved. In Jesus my reservation and home in heaven has already been secured. So there is joy. Always joy.

Yes, troubles will come. But Jesus overcomes trouble. In fact he said that very thing! At the end of this same chapter from John, Jesus said, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (v.33).

Jesus’ words this morning are profound. They aren’t what we might expect. They’re profound in part, at least, because they’re… normal. Average. Real. He’s not the helicopter parent who pretends that nothing bad will ever happen to us in this world. It will, because it’s not the world he created, but a broken knock-off. Of course it will let us down! 

But that trouble won’t last. While I can’t personally relate to the comparison Jesus makes, the mothers gathered here this morning can. In referring to the temporary grief of this world that will be followed by the permanent joy of the next, Jesus compared it to a woman in childbirth. “A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world” (v.21). That moment when a mother first holds in her arms the very baby that she has been holding in her womb for 9 months is a moment of elated joy that eclipses the pain of childbirth. Gone is the grief; it has been overshadowed by overwhelming joy!

Yet even that joy will eventually fade. All of this world’s joy is short-lived and fleeting. It is quickly countered by discouragement and disappointment. The quick expiration date on the world’s joy means that it has such a short shelf-life! It spoils so soon! 

But you know what joy will not fade? The joy of Jesus, a joy that can never be taken away. That joy will lack nothing, but will “complete” and “no one will take [it] away.” That joy permeates our school – students and teachers alike! That joy is evident in our church congregation and compels us to gather together in an often joyless world. Because we know that here, in this place, where Jesus is the center of all that we do, his resurrection promises us joy; it is the promise that in him we are victorious over grief!